One Last Bear Hug
Dad passed away peacefully early this morning with Pam, Suzie and James by his side.
Thanks everyone for being along with us on this journey. I know it made a difference to Dad and the family to have the love and support of friends. I hope the blog and Dad helped bring attention and reminders that everyone needs a hug and what is important in life.
Thanks to everyone especially the daily crew of Jack, Danny, Mike, and Terry. We can all hope to have friends like you guys.
Funeral arrangements are being made. The plan is to do the viewings on Sunday and the funeral on Monday but with out-of-town family it could change.
Hugs to All,
Jamie
Thanks everyone for being along with us on this journey. I know it made a difference to Dad and the family to have the love and support of friends. I hope the blog and Dad helped bring attention and reminders that everyone needs a hug and what is important in life.
Thanks to everyone especially the daily crew of Jack, Danny, Mike, and Terry. We can all hope to have friends like you guys.
Funeral arrangements are being made. The plan is to do the viewings on Sunday and the funeral on Monday but with out-of-town family it could change.
Hugs to All,
Jamie
posted by Beth at 8:08 AM
35 Comments:
Hi Jamie,
Sending you our sincere sympathies. Please remember that we are all here for you if you need babysitters, or whatever your needs are. Please call on us.
lots of love and hugs to everyone,
Brian, Joanne and family
Please know that you are all in our thoughts and prayers. We send you our deepest sympathy in this difficult time.
Love and hugs,
Barb and Norm
just know what a wonderful man just slipped from our world to a place without pain and sorrow .he waits in a serenely beautiful place just beyond the moon till its time for you all to meet again . thinking of you all and bearing some of the pain at his passing . E.Ferguson
I love you all!! xoxoxoxox
I am deeply saddened, and at a loss for words knowing what a wonderful man has just passed through this world.
Please accept my deepest sympathies , and know your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
He will never be forgotten.
Love Laura Vail
staff nurse, Unit One QEH
We have just read of Barry's passing. The world has lost a good & wise man. There will never be anyone like him again. As I write this, tears are rolling down, but I know there will be two bright twinkling stars in the sky tonight.
When I see them I will remember the twinkle in Barry's eyes. He has done a lot in the last year or so to bring people from all over the world, closer to each other. The power of one man's passion for life & his wisdom is simply amazing.
We will miss Barry, not the doctor, but the man we were privileged to know. Our thoughts & prayers are with Pam & the entire family at this difficult time. Be assured he is at peace, no more pain, he is waiting for you all to come join him in God's own time.
Hugs & prayers to all,
Mike & Sharon Savidant
Thoughts and Prayers from all of us islanders in Van City.
Our deepest sympathy to you, Jamie, and your entire family. May beautiful memories give you strength at this difficult time.
Sharon and Kristin Dolak
Our deepest sympathy,the tremendous number of comments and best wishes expressed over the length of Barry's illness, says it all. He will be sadly missed.
Our thoughts are with your family at this time, may you take some comfort in knowing that he is at peace.
No doubt his stories and acts of kindness will be around for a long time.
Patsy,Lyall and family
We are thinking of you all. Barry taught us so much over these past months - most of all, how to get through the hardest times with humor and courage. How many times did he say that last summer was the best summer of his life? He was a gift to all who knew him, and that gift will keep on giving with every hug we exchange.
Island poet Frank Ledwell said it best:
" Somewhere along these red cliffs
...If you will let your stricken spirits soar,
They will reach out
And grasp the invisible hand."
Peace and love to all of you.
Mary Beth, Paul and family
See Ya at the 19th hole BEARCAT!
GOD BLESS!
I know that people will be telling "Barry stories" for many years to come.
His love of children, his generosity, his quick wit, and the way he treated everyone the same, regardless of their circumstances, were his outstanding qualities.
And, ultimately, it was how he dealt with his illness and prognosis that will remain one of his most shining legacies. He truly taught us all to "live like we were dying." His death is as much an inspiration as his life.
Thank-you, Barry.
"Cuz"
We are deeply saddened by the devasting loss of a great doctor, a great friend and an all around great person. He will never be forgotten.
With deepest sympathy,
Johnnie & Judy Reid
I'm thinking of you all, Barry was a great person in my life, I'll miss him a lot.
Love you guys,
Morgan
Barry left us with memories of what we need to be... full of love and life and laughter and not to take life so seriously! We really need to take a closer look at our own lives and see whether we lived "up" to Barry's standards or not! He was a specialist in his own league. He devoted his life to his profession and was still able to provide humour to difficult situations! We were privileged to have such an experienced individual available to us and we should only wish Pam and all his family blessings in thanks for such a God given grace. Take good care.
I enter into this blog tonight with a heavy heart for two reasons, one because we have lost a great person and the other that it is the end of a tremendous journey that one individual namely Dr. Barry Ling allowed us all to share with him. It has now become final for him but we can never forget his inspiration and how he shared his hugs and love for others. He was my Doctor for about fourteen years and I can honestly say that not once have I ever seen this man without a smile. I think that's a very good record. I know that he is in heaven now and free from pain and sickness. To all the Ling family I extend my sincere sympathy and thank you Beth for setting up this Blog and allowing us to play a small part in Barry's Journey. God Bless you All, Sharon MacF
To all of Barry's family
I have been stunned from the beginning at the quiet grace and honesty which Barry displayed in this blog. He has shown great strength in coping with his unfortunate diagnosis and prognosis in a way that is desirable but seldom seen.
His weekly updates and comments were a wonderful display of humour, acceptance, love and honesty.
The whole family is to be commended on their openness and the willingness to share this time with others. The invitation to anyone who wished to participate was outstanding.
I am in awe.
It is with a very heavy heart that this Golfer report, just how much The Big Dog meant to her!!! He has taught me so much and his honesty of living life to the fullest will be what I remember.my thoughts are with everyone tonight. Thanks again Beth for coming up with this blog. Hugs to all and I know The Big Dog is keeping an eye on Us. Love
The Golfer.
To Suzie and all of Barry's family,
My deepest sympathies - my thoughts are with you.
Suzie - wish I was closer so I could give you a big hug.
Love, Karen, Colin Jack and Josh in Ottawa
I too would want to express my sincerest sympathy to you all in the loss of Dr. Ling. Thank you so much for setting up this blog to keep us all informed of how everything was going. I have a very heavy heart at this time as well for the loss of a very special human being. I'm sure God will have an important place of honor for him in heaven. I pray that the good Lord will give you all the strength, comfort, and courage that you will need to get through this very trying time in the days, weeks, and months ahead. A great big bear hug to you all.
Sincerely, Bev Gunning
(One of His Many Grateful Patients)
In a way it is kind of comforting to know that now there are two big guys looking down on us all.
-Tara Jennings
To Ling family;
Have had you all in my thoughts for some time, and especially last two days.
A very special guy has left us and will be remembered by us all in our own ways.
I remember him as the caring, compassionate, oh so crazy, orthopod that I worked with for many years. I remember him for his care of so many athletes, first while I was still at QEH, and later at the University. He sure used to liven up our Wednesday afternoons!
I learned lots from Barry over the years, mostly useful, but some naughty as well.
Having been on the patient side on occasion,I appreciated his care and attention and his honesty.
His willingness to let so many share in his journey this past year has let a lot of people know him even better.Thanks Beth for helping it happen.
Know the family and close friends will help each other through the next while and there will be plenty of bear type hugs.
Janet, the physio.
To all of Barry's family:
My sincere, and deepest sympathy to every member of Barry's family. Words seem so inadequate at this devastating time. Just know we loved him, and will always miss him.
There are 2 quotes that keep running through my mind......
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."....Martin Luther King Jr.
We all know where Barry stood! ....at the very top, in every way.
The other is:
"......... and when he shall die, take him and cut him out in little stars, and he shall make the face of heaven so fine, that all the world will be in love with night, and pay no worship to the garish sun.........William Shakespeare
God Bless each of you.
Sincerely,
Judy LeDrew
I learned about Barry's death at the race track yesterday morning. My husband and I had gone in to watch my brother, Tom MacPhee jog his son's 2 year old colt. After he was through jogging he beckoned us over to the barn. He has the colt stabled at Paul MacDonald's barn. He told us Dr. Ling had passed away. He said he knew something was wrong when he came into the barn and Paul wasn't there. I went over and spent some quiet time with Stracor, and thought about his former owner. I think Dr. Ling would have liked that.
Rest In Peace among the angels Dr. Ling.
Sincere Sympathy and hugs to all family members.
June (MacPhee) Taylor
Sending along Sincere condolences at this very sad time for all of you.. By all the comments on the blogs Dr Ling was a very special Guy..Father,Husband,Brother,Uncle,
Son, Doctor and A friend to all.. I only had the pleasure of meeting him at The Mens fashion show for Malory LeClaire several year ago,where he entered as a contestant and modeled womens clothing at the fund raiser that evening... .May God watch over each and every one of you his loving Family at this time and in all the days to come... As we Celebrate all that Barry was to everyone ....Sincerely..Linda
Dear Ling Family, when I checked "Barry's Blog" this morning I realized that my sadness and sense of loss is only a small reflection of your own. I would like to add my voice to those eloquent comments before mine and in doing so offer love and hugs to you all.
My deepest hope is for you to find peace past grief; smiles, laughter and strength in the memory of a man who showed us all how to live.
God Bless
Lise Brown
Our deepest sympathy to the Ling family. Prayers are being said as we write this memo. Many hugs to ALL!!!!
Mary and Wit Witsken
South Bend, In.
Dear Ling Family, I would like to add my name to the chorus of people, so many more than this site will ever tell, & send along my heartfelt sympathy. "Doc" was my ortho for over 6 years. His dedication to finding a cure or at least finding me relief from my chornic pain will never be forgotten. He was never one to be too proud. He consulted with many other Doctors on my behalf & when all raods seemed futile, he talked a Dr Farmer into trying to help me. Although I am still in treatment, "The Doc" layed the foundation for me. A story I pass along was one day I asked him how business was going, and he said," Hey, we get our "BREAKS". Always the humour. We would talk more about the boys & their hockey careers than we would my injury. No that was Pride !! I will miss him. May you now find Peace, as the "Doc" now has His. Forever in my prayers, & sending Polar bear hugs your way,
Norman Coffin, simply a patient
Oyster Bed Bridge
A Tribute to Dr.Ling
Dr. Ling was truly loved by all the staff of Unit One. He was a man who had a power about him which could stand a room still upon his entrance. He was a doctor who truly loved his patients; he was the true epiphany of what a doctor should be.
As we mull over memories of his time with us, although out hearts are heavy with sorrow, his name always brings a smile with a tender tale to follow.
Dr. Ling had a unique soul and a very kind heart that all could plainly see.
Many had tried but very few will ever succeed to walk his steps ( in those famous red clogs!) for he had a hand in everything...sports, politics, family, friends, and medicine...and loved each and every one.
We've had many hectic days on Unit One but those were soon forgotten when Dr. Ling hit the floor. His laughter and smile were infectious and all his ladies loved him dearly.
He helped many people throughout his short time here on earth; which very few knew about; both emotionally and financially.
Dr.Ling loved people, loved life, and was able to eminate that through his work, his banter, and his smile. He was a joy to be around. He always had a hug to offer,and he certainly believed in hands on healthcare. Some of the best parties on Unit One were when Dr. Ling was there.
"Lings Ladies" of Unit One will honor his memory for many years to come, whether through the Relay for Life, or with shared stories of days gone by.
In Loving Memory of our wonderful Doctor and friend,
Love all the staff on Unit One.
After a difficult round of tournament golf several years ago, I reached for a cold brewskie to ease the pain.
On the deck at Belvedere G C was Barry and Bobby Irwin, whom I soon found out, had had an equally difficult day.
Before very long, a fairly large group had joined me, and members finishing their round were soon laying complaints about the loud noise and laughter ringing down towards the 18th green from the clubhouse.
While we leaned back and laughed.
The stories and jokes from those two on the deck that day was something better then anything you would hear from a professional comedy troupe.
Better memories then anyone could ever hope from from a round of golf.
Sorry to hear the sad news.
Hugs to Katie, Caroline & Bates.
Love Eve & Meg McMillan, PEI
I will always remember seeing Barry sitting on the deck.
I rememeber many times the bets he and my father made about who was going to beat who at the island open, to find them both sitting on the deck laughing at each others poor performance after shooting 90 something when I came in from my round. Neither one conceding the loss, and going out the next day together to renew the battle because the first day was just a fluke.
I remember when Barry arranged for a last minute emergency consultation visit to Halifax for our 2 year old daughter julie.
I thought that it was a remarkable thing when Barry phoned that afternoon and arranged the appointment for the next morning.
It was Dec 23 and his colleague was catching a flight for Christmas holidays at noon. That speaks volumes for Barry's professional respect.
Dr Hyndman met us in the morning 8am. He explained how he was going away to play golf. I said I played at Belvedere. and he said that he had a good friend there. They had just finished a trip through Alabama, and we laughed at several stories that he had about the trip.
He gave me a message to deliver to Barry to rib him about. It was typical. As much as Barry gave a lot of digs, he received his fair share from everyone who loved him. He brought out the kid in everyone he knew and met.
The great thing about Barry, was that everyone that was drawn to him was the same type of person. All characters, all good character.
Always a joy to be near.
Miss you always,
Andrew
Our prayers are with you and your family. Our deepest sympathy to you.
love,
Glenn and Ellen
HI To Pam @ all of the Ling family. it was nice getting to meet you all at Barrys wake, wish it could have been another way. with that said, cant help but think of you all. Hope all is going well as can be expected at this most difficult time.Our Hearts go out to every one of you. i sure miss the blog. HUGS TO EVERYONE...
Love and Prayers
, Joey @ Brenda.
Dear Bear…
I know you have no tolerance for tardiness, and usually, I would do everything in my power not to test that because I’ve seen how pissed off you get at Dianne…but, I’ve had a letter I’ve been wanting to share with you for a quite a little while…but, you know, it just never seemed like the right time. So here it is now… late…and, of course, somewhat modified from the original version…
There were a few other things I know you had no tolerance for…bragging and complaining… oh and crunching hard candy… I was warned well in advance to never do that in your presence. No, you were not one to brag about anything…EXCEPT, that is, for the people you loved in your life. When it came to those you love, all modesty rules went out the window.
Everyone knows you had a special relationship with Bates. However, few may know that it began at conception. I found out I was pregnant with Bates the day my Grandfather Francis died and was told my due date was your birthday, April 27th. On Christmas Eve 2003, after learning that Bates would be a boy, he was appropriately named Bates Barry Francis Ling. You were so considerate of my maternal concerns that someone might tease him and call him Master Bates that you felt pre-emptive measures were required… so, you decided Tugger (or, Tug for short) would be his nickname instead. After that, Master Bates didn’t seem so bad after all. Come to think of it, I don’t think I have ever heard you refer to him as Bates. This also seems like an appropriate time to remind you of one of your biggest challenges in life…your inability to keep a secret. You were the shits at that…and you knew it! In fact, you were delighted that no one really expected you to keep a secret, which then gave you a free pass to share the "secret" if you felt it was share-worthy. Most people knew I was expecting before I got a chance to tell them! Oh well… that was just your way… it didn’t make you a bad person. You were just so “tickled pink” to know that you were soon getting your first grandchild and then another only four months later!
I want to thank you for loving our Bates… like only you could do. Every mother is proud, I know, but I would be beaming with pride every time I left your house after hearing all the stories about your excursions with Bates that day and how “perfectly behaved” “funny” and “smart” he was. And, I can’t count the number of times I would have people approach me (many of whom I did not know personally) and recite a Bates story told to them by you…which, of course was always followed by “he’s just in love with that little guy, you know”. One of my favorite memories of you will always be the smell of Bates when I would pick him up after a day of hanging out with Grampie and Grammy. He would always smell of your Cigar cologne… I will really miss that smell. Thank you for passing on your many loves to Bates: horses, hockey, practical jokes, nurses, etc…just to name a few. How many times did I get a phone call asking me if Bates could come out to play? “I want to take him to the rink…I want to take him to the track… I want to take him to the barn… I want to take him to the hospital the flirt with the nurses…”
Thank you for loving “Pamela”, one of my dearest friends. She has been like a mother, sister and a best friend to me…all rolled up in to one. In all of my ten+ years of knowing you, you never ever had anything but complementary words for your Darlin’. In fact, it’s almost as if you were in awe of her…you never missed an opportunity to comment on all of her many, many talents (and I frequently remind her that she has an unfair, disproportionate amount of talents for any one person)…her gardening skills, her artistic abilities, her delicious cooking, her extensive and in-depth knowledge of every jewel known to man, her exceptional ability to play golf, her design talents, her decorating talents (she taught me everything I know, as you accurately pointed out to me last fall…I think your exact words were “well, you were taught by the best”)…Thank you for showing her such a good time. I don’t know how she kept up with you…but I do know why she loved you so much…
Thank you for introducing me to your wonderful friends. Yet another one of your many talents… you must have received high honors in Advanced Friend Selection. I am in awe of their dedication to you and the family, not just at the beginning, but throughout your entire illness…a dedication that I expect to continue indefinitely. They all loved you so much…these big, macho “guys” guys… so soft and mushy on the inside…they all just respond with, “Well, he’s just so damn easy to love”. Just like you, I think they’d “cry at a good steak”. I feel for them as much as all the family…you can sense their grief…you can see it in their face…evidenced by their desire to soak up every last minute they could with you…
Thank you for countless Fat Sunday bbqs and your famous Barry Burgers… they were always “most enjoyable”… and your predictable “oooh baby” after your first bite of every burger…oh, and your relentless teasing about my ferocious appetite…you’re forgiven. I still can’t quite wrap my head around the reality that I’ll never be greeted at your front door again with a big “Hello Darlin’! What can I get you to drink?” It was never, “Can I get you something to drink?” No, it was never a matter of “if”…it was a matter of “what”. Usually, I wouldn’t dare decline in fear of disappointing you. I still can’t quite imagine that a phone call to your house won’t be answered with a “Hello…What’s going on wit choo” and an “Oh Pamela...phone’s for you darlin’” …even if I was just calling to talk to you! Thank you for always being so good to me. I feel so fortunate to have had you in my life.
As you know, Bates is doing very well. He told me today that Grampie is in heaven and God is going to take really good care of him. He has also said things like “he can see us…but we can’t see him…and we can still talk to him, you know.” Bates has also shared this information with all of his teachers at school, I am told. The other day, Bates asked me if we could call heaven to talk to Grampie. I told him that the wonderful part of Grampie going to Heaven is that we don’t have to call him to talk to him anymore…we can talk to him anywhere – anytime. Yesterday, he had on the Florida Panthers jersey you bought him in Florida last year. He said, “Mom, who gave me this hockey sweater?” He already knew, but I told him again anyway, “Grampie got that for you.” Then, Bates looked up to the sky and said with a big smile, “Thanks, Grampie!” He has a good understanding of what’s going on. Children are so amazing.
You know, I once heard Heaven compared in a very thought provoking way to the internet. Heaven has no physical address, nor does the internet. If you asked someone where they were going and they said, “I’m going to the internet”, you might feel a bit confused. But the internet is a place that very much exists… as does Heaven, although we cannot physically go there. We use the internet to communicate, to learn, to teach, to enjoy music, etc…We also carry on our non-physical lives doing all of these same activities in Heaven. How appropriate, then, that this Blog has been the source of so much communication, learning, teaching, and sharing with you and about you. It has been a “God Send”. Thank you, Beth. Oprah is getting a call…
As all of those you have touched over the years reflected upon your life over the past week, I don’t think there is one individual who came away from all of this without thinking that they have to step it up a bit in life… I am comfortable saying that most probably made a mental “to do list” of
Personal Improvements Required.
1. Stop complaining and choose only to see and talk about the good around you
2. Know and understand that when someone does something wrong, it doesn’t necessarily make them a bad person.
3. Take advantage of every opportunity to make someone laugh…but never at someone else’s expense.
4. Give someone a hug. No one has ever said, “Did you see that person just give me a hug… what a weirdo!”
5. Be generous with your time, your hugs, your complements, and your money. You can’t take any of them with you.
Well Bear, in closing, I think everyone’s lives around here just recently became a lot more dull…but I also know one thing for certain… heaven just got a hell of a lot more interesting! I can just hear you upon entering the golden gates… “MERCY!…This should be most enjoyable…”
I love you. I thank you. I congratulate you on a life well-lived. And, I will always remember you….
You will be “woefully” missed.
Big Hug and Kiss…Mother Tugger
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